Wisdom On the Perfect Love of God

Hi everyone! I feel REALLY bad that for awhile I have been “missing in action,” but our last eight months have been full of fixing up houses, moving to a new location, and now traveling back and forth to Cincinnati for basketball. In this crazy season of life, I have grown closer to God, and also closer to some very good friends. God’s plans and timings are definitely perfect! Anywhoo…… I am here to inform you all that I have not deserted the Joyfully You team! Often times during our transition I’d take a break, sit on a pile of boxes, and read the new posts you all have been writing. You guys are awesome!

As I get older, I realize that the number-one thing that girls like to talk about is boys. Likewise, (you understand if you have brothers) I have become aware that the subject of girls is a very encouraged and popular subject among the guys as well. If we are all truthful, we want to discuss this subject with on another. It’s like the ‘elephant in the room’.

I love playing with guys. They bring so much more life, fun, laughter, and competition into every game, from football to a midnight game of cards. I’ve had friends that are boys from a very young age, and that has never been a problem. Then, as if overnight, there is suddenly tension and awkwardness between you. Suddenly, your closest friend likes a boy that’s been your friend forever. Why?

This is only one tough situation between guys and girls that I’ve been confronted with. I’ve absolutely loved the posts a couple JY members have written giving some tips on this subject, and I wanted to add some of my own experiences and encouragements.

Here we go!

For the longest time I thought I was weird to like a guy. Why did guys suddenly make me nervous? I felt ashamed of this new me, and often times sat guiltily in a corner as my friends discussed their “latest” crushes. (Can anyone relate?) What was suddenly wrong with me???

My first run-in with these new feelings was sadly when I was very young and was kissed on the cheek by a little boy at vacation bible school. I was disgusted, and naturally went straight to my parents. I’ll never forget my dad during ‘that’ conversation when he strictly told me that if any boy EVER dared to kiss me I was to hit him across the face! I will say that this new authority made me feel much less vulnerable.:)

ALL THAT to say that during my young years I tried to avoid most boys, and faced boys that were interested in me with a “don’t-come-any-closer-or-I’ll-punch-you-across-the-face” kind of attitude. I am now ashamed of how cold I was with many boys, and how I brushed them off without even a hint of kindness. They could have been just needing a friend to confide in. Why did I slam the door in their face just because they were boys? I believe that this extreme is just as bad as flirting. If your anything like me you’re still trying to find that perfect balance. 

I wanted to share with you all some advise that God has graciously given to me through His word, and also through my parents and other godly ladies in my life. The Lord has been so gracious to me!

  1. SHOULD I VOCALIZE MT THOUGHTS?

More than once, I’ve been at a party and have been laughed at because of my innocence and awkwardness when talking about boys. I always felt so sinful when I spoke about my struggles. So I began to wonder if it was okay to talk about such things. Why did it have to be all that every girl wanted to talk about? Why was it all that I really wanted to talk about?

However, I know now that those feelings and struggles toward guys are God given. God made us attracted to each other, and talking about it to your friends and relating isn’t wrong. As long as we keep God in the center of it, and remember His words in what we say to each other (NOT the natural tendency to gossip!), we should talk to one another about what we’re going through! I’ve learned that it frees and encourages you to know that you’re not alone. It also gives you tips along the way. However, if your conversations leave you feeling dirty and guilty (One you wouldn’t exactly want your mom to hear…) God probably isn’t in the center of it.

2.   7 TIPS IN GUARDING MY HEART….AND (SOMEWHAT) AVOID GETTING CRUSHES

a) Talk to God about it! The Lord knows you, made you, and loves you. He wants you to come to Him! I have often been encouraged to pray for boys who come into my life. Seek His face first in prayer and as you daily dig into His word. Ask God to show you this guy’s heart and reveal truth.

b) Some girls get crushes quite easily, and others don’t. Some girls like three different boys in a day and the other extreme is the girl who gets very serious about just one guy and spends her time, thoughts, and energy all on him. Okay, girls. We’ve all “noticed” a guy at one point in our life if we are honest…..that’s how God created us. But if we immediately believe that that’s the guy for us just because of his looks, we are worse that Samuel as he sought a King for Israel. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.

c) Stay away from bad company! Watch the girls you’re around. If possible surround yourselves with godly influences, and try to limit time with and be alert and careful in your conversations with the girls that aren’t exactly walking with the Lord. Bad company corrupts!!! If you are constantly in a bad group they will rub off on you!

d) Seek good company! (LOL) Well this is kinda obvious but important! I have been blessed with an older sister who loves the Lord more than anything else (My second mother:) and I always know that I can go to her for anything. I trust her and her opinions completely! All of my sisters are the best company one could possibly have and my very best friends. I have also been immensely blessed with you JY gals and also my new basketball group who I know are all on the same path of purity that I am. Praise the LORD!

e) Stay close to your parents! Talk to them. They’ve been there and done that! They’ve failed before and have experience. LOL!… Not to mention they love you like crazy and want what is best for you first and foremost. They would love to sit and talk to you about any of your doubts, concerns, or questions! I’ll never forget what one elderly lady told me one time. She said “The one and only thing I could do and did right was trust my mother’s wisdom”.

f) Patience! This is hard! Patience is easier for some than for others, but I think that we can all agree that it’s hard. It’s hard to be patient when “everyone else” (comparison) isn’t waiting for love. However, God’s timing is perfect, and when you’re in His will He will bless you. Wait! Wait! Wait!.. It’s key! Especially at fifteen-years-old!

g) Follow Christ first! Satan will do everything in his power to distract you from our heavenly father! Follow the Lord, seek Him, and walk with Him. Don’t worry about anything else! There is no need to look for your prince! You will be walking along with God and doing His will when all-of-the-sudden your prince will sweep you off your feet. Then you’ll continue your journey with the Lord together, hand in hand. That’s what I call the ‘Perfect Meeting’!

Your crushes will change. You should never regret something you’ve said or done with one of your crushes. Keep a clear conscience. It also helps when you know that that guy is going to be someone else’s husband someday. Respect his future wife, and stay guiltless and completely pure….. fyi: MODESTY!

Lastly…. Some Bite-sized Pieces of Wisdom (Not from me…lol):

  1. Purity starts in our hearts. The heart that seeks, is in fellowship with, strives to serve, and loves the Lord is the one that brings joy.
  2. Be aware of what the world has to lure you away from a pure heart: movies and TV shows, music, peer pressure, wrong friends, and a ‘Who cares! Do it!’ attitude. Be on your guard.
  3. Know this: You are worth waiting for! God already has a plan. Keep your eyes focused on Him and everything else will fall into place. (Matthew 6:33)
  4. Stay busy! Develop hobbies. Don’t let yourself pour so much time and effort into being noticed by guys.
  5. Enjoy these seasons you are in right now! These years aren’t about waiting around for your earthly prince. For right now we get to enjoy our heavenly prince. Fall in love with Him first!
  6.  Feel God’s love and love others! Love…the greatest of these things! LOVE HARD!

Phil 4: 8        1 Tim 4:12            Dan 20 :20-21

Many blessings to ALL of you!

7 thoughts on “Wisdom On the Perfect Love of God

  1. Caroline K. says:

    Wow Savannah! I absolutely love this post! You delved so deep into this topic! Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom with all of us!
    Many Blessings,
    Caroline

    Like

  2. whatdinnywore says:

    Great advice, Savannah! I appreciate your honesty + wise advice. Parents can be a great help when it comes to those sticky situations. 🙂 May God continue to bless you as you serve Him (and someday bring you a wonderful husband)!

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Heaven says:

    Wow, this is a great post, Savannah! I enjoyed all of the tips you gave. Some girls are boy crazy and try to get any boy’s attention at any cost. However, that boy won’t stay forever. So, as Christian young ladies, we need to work focusing on God and His plan for us. He will always be us for eternity and so will His love for us. The one who will be our spouse will come in do time, we just have to wait for the Lord to bring him. 😊

    Like

  4. Summer G. says:

    Wow, Savannah, you blew this out of the park! Thank you oh so much for taking the time to write this! It is greatly appreciated and was a blessing! ❤

    Like

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